There's a woman who rides at my barn and the two of us have become pretty good friends. I'll call her Jessica. We have the same trainer, and are at similar levels in our riding, but lately I've been struggling with some feelings of resentment towards Jessica. She bought a horse who was already totally made, while I'm scraping by with an off-the-track Thoroughbred who is a loose cannon somedays and is learning everything from the ground up. Even though I love hanging out with Jessica when we're together, I can't help but start to compare what I don't have to what she has (which is seemingly everything) and how much faster she's progressing in the jumpers than I am. After all, if I had her horse, and her money, I'm sure I'd already be doing the 1.20m classes too!
How can I reconcile my feelings of comparison and jealousy with actually really liking Jessica as a person and wanting to cheer her on? It makes me feel like a terrible person to feel this way. Help!" - Alison K.
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Article written by: Dr. Judy Ho