A Parent’s View with Tara Manning

This article is from the January 2021 Horse Deals magazine.

Behind every child rider, there is a parent who supports their child’s chosen discipline. Any sport a child is involved in takes a commitment in time and money to realise the child’s dream. Add horses into the equation and the commitment in time and money doubles!

So who are the parents behind the child rider? What are their thoughts on the benefits and life lessons that horses and riding provide to their child? In this series, you will find out about the parent’s view from behind the scenes and at the sidelines.

What are your children’s names and how old are they? I am lucky enough to have two children — Ella, 14, and Harrison (Harry) who’s nearly 11.

How did your children commence their riding career? They really just grew up around horses. Coming from a horsey background myself, I was always keen or hopeful that the kids might ride, but it was not something that we ‘pushed’ on either of them.

My husband (Ty) and I both rode from an early age ourselves in Show Horse and then moved into eventing. We both rode competitively up to FEI level eventing right up to just after Ella was born.
Prior to children we were living and working in the Western Districts of Victoria in Hamilton. Just before Ella was born we decided to make the move from Hamilton, back to South Australia so that we were closer to family. My mother (Helen Trebilcock) still lived on the family ‘childhood’ property and we were able to put a few horses at her place.

When Ella was about three years old she started off riding by being led around on an old eventer of mine, Nick Off. She enjoyed riding and generally being around the horses, so we sourced some ponies to get her started off.

Harry followed in Ella’s footsteps, also starting to ride quite young. He is actually quite a natural rider, but he likes to dabble in a variety of sports so was never as keen as Ella initially. He has recently decided to turn his hand to Showjumping and eventing, and has an amazing little jumping pony, so he is quite keen on going further with his riding now.

What were your initial thoughts when you realised they were into horses? To be honest I am not really sure there was a definitive ‘realisation’ that they were into horses. ‘Horses’ were just something that we did as a family, so they really grew up being around the horse’s day to day when we were working with them.

I am so pleased they enjoy horses. I have such fond memories of my own childhood growing up with my family and horses.

What was your experience with horses prior to your children’s interest? When I was younger I started out in show horse. I was lucky enough to compete at many of the royal shows across Australia; winning a Lady Rider at Sydney Royal was a highlight of my showing career. Through show horse, our family became quite close friends with Gill Rolton. Gill rode one of our Show Horses and I spent some time training with her. I then decided that jumping was more for me and I was lucky enough to have supportive parents that encouraged me to pursue this passion and get into eventing and showjumping.

I had a string of nice eventers which I started off the track myself and was fortunate enough to ride at one of the last Gawler 3DE’s. I went on to compete and train with Vicky and Wayne Roycroft. I learnt a lot during my time with them and later competed at the Adelaide International Horse Trials 4 star event in 1999, finishing 2nd with my superstar eventer Lewis, who was selected in the Australian Eventing Team to compete in Taupo, New Zealand. Lewis and I were longlisted to compete at Sydney Olympics but unfortunately an injury, a month or so out, ended that dream as it has for so many in this sport.

Does your own personal experience with horses have an impact on your children’s sport? I feel our own experiences certainly have helped, as we know the highs and lows of the sport and can reflect on the good and the bad days with a realistic view and put things into perspective.

At home, my husband Ty will often instruct Ella, and I will help Harry as he requires a little more patience. The fact that we both rode means we can explain some of the technicalities to the kids and share with them some of the aspects of owning, preparing and competing horses.

I do feel that having that experience of bringing on horses and preparing them up to an Elite level myself has certainly helped with both the kids. Although we are all competitive, having been at that level it can help keep the bigger picture in mind when planning out programs and working through issues and problems to help both the children and their horses progress forward.

What were your expectations of your child’s first pony and what did you end up with? First and foremost I think the must have characteristic of any of our horses or ponies is that they are safe. Something that is not too reactive and is going to look after the children when they are learning, forgiving of a few mistakes, is ultimately what we would look for in a first pony.

The first off the lead pony Ella had was a well-schooled grey pony called Dolly. She was quite old when we purchased her, but her best attribute was that she was forward and didn’t need too much kicking. After Dolly, we were offered a wonderful buckskin pony Rivington Wind Chime on lease from Sarah at Rivington Stud, which was the first of a string on Rivington ponies for us.
Harry rode some of Ella’s at times on the lead, but his first off the lead pony was Rivington Posy - Posy was just perfect! A feisty little grey, 11.2hh mare who although would put everyone else in their place, just seemed to love Harry, even when he was bouncing around, wielding a sword or wearing dress up that flapped all over her.

How do you juggle your time for horses between the rest of your commitments? It is always a bit of a juggle at our house week to week, which makes it feel like we are always chasing our tail, but I don’t think I would have it any other way.

Ty and I are both teachers in Adelaide, we have a property in the hills and we also run a metalwork sculpture business. This means a fairly early start and at times, we are often home late, after school meetings and other sport commitments. Ella and Harry both play football and basketball for school as I think it is important that they get to experience a team sport, as well as
a chance to play a sport with their school friends.

The best part of our jobs is that we all have weekends and holidays together so we can really focus on bringing on the young horses and putting in a lot of groundwork at these times.
We currently have six horses in various stages of work at home. Ella will ride a couple of horses after school most days of the week during summer; when we have the longer days and I will then lunge one or two. We alternate the horses day to day throughout the week. In winter we often try and work one or two before we leave for school and we all pitch in which makes it quicker and easier working them, rugging and feeding up.

What are, or what do you think the life lessons and benefits of your children being involved with horses? Ella has learnt some amazing life skills. She is such a hard worker, organised and such a great competitor. She has learnt to cope with the highs and lows of the sport, travelled extensively and appreciated all of the opportunities she has had. Ella has learnt a huge amount from Margot Haynes and David Quayle at Lily’s Stud, who treat her as part of their family, offering advice and instruction on many valuable life lessons. She has travelled to interstate competitions with them since she was quite young, which has certainly taught her independence and resilience when away from home. She has had the opportunity to ride so many wonderful horses for a range of people and she tries her hardest not to let the owners down and will always give 100%. I am so proud of her achievements, and for someone her age we believe she is so professional, yet humble.

This year Harry decided he wanted to compete at the State Showjumping Championships so he was told he had to work Birdy (Rivington Little Bird) each week and prove that he could jump an 80 course before the event. So he worked Birdy, often twice a day, did the practice rounds and then on the day he jumped a clear 95cm jump off on a 12hh pony to finish sixth in an open class at the State Championships. He was so proud of himself and he learnt that hard work reaps rewards. It was a lovely moment for him.

I think the lessons that horses teach us are transferable to dealing with people and day to day life. Dealing with the high pressure, fast-paced or stressful situations training and competing horses create, teaches a whole range of problem-solving skills, empathy, patience and certainly brings out the best and worst in people, all of which the children learn to recognise and work through as riders.

As a family what sacrifices have you had to make in order to fulfil your children’s passion? I would not really consider that we have made too many sacrifices. As a family we receive unbelievable support from all the children’s grandparents and our family friends, as they understand that this is life as we know it.

We are both lucky enough to have great jobs that help fund the horses, as we all know it is not a cheap sport. Missing the odd birthday party, BBQ or function, which can make the kids a little disappointed at times, but I feel the kids are so lucky to have had the opportunities to experience such a challenging yet rewarding lifestyle. Given the choice they will often choose a horse event over another social function.

Each year we try to schedule in ‘horse free’ holidays away from the horses and participate in other sports or go camping and travelling with friends and family.

Horse riding is known as high risk. How do you come to terms with the risk factors? I try not to over analyse it too much, but I also make sure they are as safe as they possibly can be. They always have to wear the correct safety gear and always have someone with them when they ride.

We have always been careful as to what horses Ella and Harry ride, making sure they are appropriate and safe.

I also now realise how nervous my parents were when watching me jump at a high level and I am sure as the horses and jumps get bigger it will only become harder. The continued reviewing of safety standards is somewhat reassuring and hopefully it will only get safer as time goes on.

We have also been quite conscious of not letting either of the children progress through the grades prematurely. Ella often finds it difficult when some other riders her age are jumping higher grades as they have had older more experienced horses purchased for them. From a parents’ perspective it is challenging at times holding them back.

What enjoyment do you get out of watching your children ride? This is a hard question as I am a terrible watcher. I get way too nervous and worried, not so much for their safety but more that the horses go well for them. We have developed a process where I generally keep busy doing something else and spy out of the corner of my eye when they are in the ring. At home though, I love it, watching Ella break, train and develop young horses. She is currently competing on three horses she has developed from scratch.

What advice can you give to other parents whose child may be interested in riding? Watch, listen and learn – never think that you know it all! Even after years of riding myself I am still learning. Make sure that you get some good advice. Don’t be too proud to ask for help. There are plenty of other parents who have ‘been there, done that,’ are passionate about the sport of equestrian, and more than willing to help new families entering the sport.

The skills, empathy and responsibilities that come with looking after, training and caring for another ‘being’ is something that can only come from fully committing to a lifestyle like owning a horse.

No matter what level you decided to enter into or compete at, it is a huge commitment and quite an expensive one timewise and financially. It is however, something that will teach your children so many valuable life lessons and give them an experience that they will never forget. Although it is often a commitment and a lifestyle that only other ‘horsey families’ will fully understand, it is a sport that can offer so much and creates friendships and memories that last a lifetime.

It’s hard to imagine it any other way!

Sign up to our newsletter